So Jay, this might be a question you might ask: Why the cooked, undrinkable 2012 Les Chaffots?
If Ray is monitoring this thread, he’ll be well prepared, I’m sure.
Don’t think Todd would hire him as a monitor…but, hey, my boss works in strange ways.
Ray is always well prepared. I don’t think the interview will shed much light on his actual winemaking past, present or future. It’s not a deposition and Jay, intelligent and well meaning though he is, will be out of his league dealing with this charming, yet deeply flawed guy.
On a totally unrelated note, I found this article interesting.
There are nine specific diagnostic criteria (symptoms) for borderline personality disorder defined in the
Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition, Text Revision (referred to as DSM-IV-TR, or just DSM-IV) published in 2000 by the American Psychiatric Association.1 In order to be diagnosed with borderline disorder, you must have five of the nine criteria.It is now common to list the symptoms of the disorder in four groups or dimensions:
- Excessive, unstable and poorly regulated emotional responses.
The most commonly affected emotions are anger, anxiety and depression. Of the nine DSM-IV criteria for borderline disorder, three fall into this group:Affective (emotional) instability including intense, episodic emotional anguish, irritability, and anxiety/ panic attacks
Anger that is inappropriate, intense and difficult to control, and
Chronic feelings of emptiness
In addition, if you suffer from borderline disorder, you may also experienceEmotional over reactivity (“emotional storms”)
Emotional responses that are occasionally under reactive, and
Chronic boredom
2. Impulsive behaviors that are harmful to you or to others.
Two of the DSM-IV criteria for borderline disorder are in this group:Self-damaging acts such as excessive spending, unsafe and inappropriate sexual conduct, substance abuse, reckless driving, and binge eating, and
Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, threats, or self-injurious behavior
Also, you may engage in other impulsive behaviors such as actions that are harmful and destructive to yourself, others or to property.
- You may have an inaccurate view of yourself and others, and experience a high level of suspiciousness and other misperceptions.
Two of the DSM-IV criteria for borderline disorder are included in this group:
A markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of your self (your identity), and
Paranoid ideation or severe dissociative episodes (transient and stress related)
In addition, you may consistently experienceExpectations of negative and harmful attitudes and behaviors from most people
Impaired social reasoning under stress
Impaired memory under stress
4. Finally, you may experience tumultuous and very unstable relationships.The final two DSM-IV criteria fall in this group:
You may engage in frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment, and
Your relationships may be very intense, unstable, and alternate between the extremes of over idealizing and undervaluing people who are important to you
You may also recognize that you have overly dependent and clinging behavior in important relationships.
bump.
Did you reach out to him to come on to the show, or did he reach out to you first?
As I said, I am no 60 minutes sort of guy. So if you expect us to be grilling him like a steak, I can promise you that you will be disappointed. Perhaps avoid it and do not listen to the show (assuming we do post it).
I will be asking him rather blunt questions, but I am not planning on a “gotcha” show. I’m sorry.
BTW, I would love to hear other questions that are not shipping related.
On my list!
Indeed I will be disappointed. If you aren’t asking poignant questions about the issues that have come up and affected HUNDREDS of Berserkers (not to mention the likely thousands that are not) why give him the airtime and a chance for another puff piece?
I would not argue with that assessment. What I has hoping for is that I could ask Ray to make some commitments “for the record”. Even if he says “yes, I made numerous false statements” what does that get you? Ideally, what would want him to say?, or more importantly from my perspective, what would you like him to do?
Don’t listen and you cant be disappointed.
I just thought of something. Why don’t I see if I could get Ray to agree to do a Berserkers interview?
True, but my disappointment is with Grape Radio, too, if you are just giving him a nice little platform to spread his b.s. while so many have been screwed, and he’s nary given a thought to it.
I cant control how he answers, but I am control my questions.
What $700 bottle of wine is your wife’s favorite?
(credit: anonymous)
I have only been watching MI from the sidelines as a “Lesson of what not to do” in the wine business. Not that I think it should be that hard to make wine and deliver it in a timely manner with no hidden fees. The other best part is those with hopes of “starting a brand someday” will have the MI experience to look at to decide if its really worth it. As it is hard to get all parts of the business right on your first try.
Good luck Jay!
p.s. Any update on when my episode will go live? Not that I want you to 60 minutes him but I am sure you will handle Ray just fine. Even a few pointed questions will be a great insight into his thoughts.
You’ve described anyone who’s been on an Internet dating site for more than a year.
Thanks for the Good Luck wishes. Eric and I will need it. Its Eric’s call on when we will post. However, if we think the show sucks, we will not post it.
I do not know if Ray is a con artist. I like him, but that does not mean anything. I do know that as a business man (or even as a con artist), he is not very good. So I am biased. I plan to tell him that upfront before we start the interview. However, I feel we can produce a show that at a minimum is entertaining, and potentially enlightening.
I believe that one can build trust without much effort. Simply be honest with yourself and those around you. Never fail to deliver on a promise. Once trust is broken it almost never can be rebuilt. That is why I value trust so much.
I’d save any “upfront” comments to Ray until the microphones are recording. Why let his first response to your comments be off mic?
I’ll also wish you good luck and I hope this ends up more of a warning to future MI buyers of Ray’s past actions than any kind of promotion for the brand.
Good luck as well. I would not be surprised if he blows the whole thing up/off and blames you for it. The only reason he would engage with you is that he feels you are a “mark”. It is what grifters do. Again, good luck.
After you’ve seen his ‘work,’ and as a Berserker, your choice to promote this guy remains incomprehensible. Then, to promote yourself here for this despicable guy, even more so.
Maybe you can get Erin Andrews to do a promotional appearance at a Marriott.