Really special wines with wine friends or with non-wino great friends?

[Justin_S1]

I really like sharing wine with my wine friends, who are very enthusiastic and generous. And they are just good people to boot.

But my most memorable experiences have been with my wife. She doesn’t know wine-geek lingo and finds it boring when I geek out, but she has a good palate. She’s able to describe what she’s tasting in her own words. We tend to open nice stuff on days that are significant to both of us (anniversaries, birthdays, romantic dates, etc.). And I think because we only tend to open one bottle between the two of us, I’m able to follow that bottle a little more closely.

For other friends / family that know less about wine, I still like to share good but not super expensive wine. And honestly, my parents would enjoy many wines less if they knew how much it costs…

[Rodrigo_B]

I have many friends that are just not very big on wine. They drink it and enjoy it, but the intricacies of it or even a variety or wine region is largely irrelevant for them. For those friends, I tend to mostly open nice, but not too expensive wines that are also relatively easy to replace.

I don’t have any problem opening special wines with non-wine friends, especially if they have never had something like that, but if I know the enjoyment for those non-wine friends will be the same whether I open a $50 or $500 bottle, then I tend to lean more towards bottle that I either have a lot of or are easier to replace. The enjoyment for them and me will be largely the same, and I can only buy so much of those rarer or more expensive wines.

There’s also the perpetual question of price and value that gets eventually gets asked. Answering that and trying to justify and explain why a wine costs what it does is not particular a discussion I care to have constantly with non-wine friends. I already have plenty of friends being shocked that I spent $50 on a bottle of wine, at times I just don’t want to explain to them why I purchased and decided to open a wine that costs many times that.

That said, one of my favourite things is opening wines for folks that makes them more interested in wine. So if I get to do that to a friend, I’m all too happy to open pretty much anything from my cellar.

[Mike_Grammer]

I can be your friend.

It is a good question, Tom. I generally agree with what Fred and some others have responded with. Good friends who know a bit less about wines, I will still want to serve great stuff to show those people what’s possible. It also allows interesting conversation if there’s a cross-section of your two groups. What might change is the choice of great wines. For geeks, I might pull something (or somethings) more obscure or that will engender more geek conversation. Thanks for posting

Mike

[J.Vizuete]

There is a lot of wisdom and generosity in this thread.

When I was getting seriously interested in wine but didn’t have the coin to taste the stuff I was reading about, a few older guys welcomed me into the fold and allowed me to experience wines I certainly wouldn’t have been able to alone.

Many of us have had that or similar experiences, and we are ready and eager to evangelize to someone who might be hooked by a wine they experienced from us.

The problem is, you don’t know when that moment is going to happen, or with which wine. I’ve been lucky to have reasonably broad Bordeaux experience but have yet to try 89 HB or Petrus. We did drink the 89 LMHB last June over a few hours and it was just glorious, but not at peak yet. I say this to point out that the wines you’ve chosen are real legends and it would be a shame if they weren’t appreciated as such.

For your cab leaning friends, what about a Bdx blend from Napa (take your pick), a younger (say early 00s) LMHB and the 89? That way you can see their reaction to a properly aged top flight bdx in context?

Ultimately the goal is for their pleasure and yours. Good luck to that end!

[David_Baum]

I’m the same age. You’re gonna drink them for yourself more than anything. Your wine geek friends may find they just don’t hit their pallet. Or they might. Your great non wine geek friends might love them. Or they might not. These are things you cannot control for. It’s your day. Who do you want to be with when you are drinking them is the answer. Do you want to talk about the nuances or do you want to be surrounded by those you love most. I know the answer for me but it’s your day

[Sarah_Kirschbaum]

I agree with and second many comments here. One thing I want to add is how much pleasure I get from sharing rare or hard-to-get or even, yes, now expensive wines with people who truly love wine, but likely would never be able to taste them otherwise. I was lucky enough to buy some wines when they were more easily obtainable than they are now. While sharing them with others who have and collect these things is great, there is a special joy to me when that comes from opening them with people I’ve heard say things like “I’ll probably never get to try an aged Keller.”

[YLee]

I share my special wines with my family and close friends. Either they are into wines or not doesn’t matter to me in this case.

[DougS]

@Andrew_K

Had a small group of neighbors over for my wife’s 40th. Opened an '02 Drouhin CM 1er to start. Two guys had beers and one lady preferred to open the Apothic Red she brought. Served an '82 Canon with dinner and only a couple partook. Just doesn’t make sense to open stuff people don’t even want, much less appreciate.

A while back I had a couple of friends over and they were enjoying an inexpensive Loire Chenin. When the bottle was empty, I thought it would be fun to pull one of the lower level Guiberteau whites to compare. I accidentally opened a Clos de Carmes. They didn’t really like the wine, far preferring the ~$20 Saumur we had previously.

If I have/had several of something, I’ll open one with anyone who might enjoy it. If I only ever had 1 or 2 and they’re really precious to me (not replaceable), I will wait and open that with fellow wine nerds.

[MChang]

I tend to open nice wines but not necessarily the best ones with family/friends. I do like opening birth year wines for people on birthdays, which I think they tend to find really fun. Last year we had a fun birthday dinner where I opened a 82 lynch for someone’s 40th which everyone really liked, and a 98 Musar at the same time to go with lamb which people also loved.

[Steve_McL]

Agree 100%. Well said @Dennis_Atick and @Chris_Seiber
I often have wine-curious friends who want to try a better-than-they-are-used-to version of name-that-variety (in our house, Pinot, Chard, Riesling mostly). For them I usually reach for good examples of Oregon Pinot/Chard or a nice Prum Kabinett. But my efforts to turn people onto red Burgs tend to fall on deaf palates.

But with fellow wine geeks, say 4-6 people, we’ll open special bottles for sure. Its one of the special joys of oeno-geekitude to explore these bottles together, comparing and discussing.

Of note, among my favorite ways to explore a special bottle (or three) is with only one or two other winos. Quieter, and easier to pay attention somehow.

[Dennis_Atick]

@Steve_McL

Of note, among my favorite ways to explore a special bottle (or three) is with only one or two other winos. Quieter, and easier to pay attention somehow.

You don’t like our norm of 6 or 7 of us with 18 bottles open?

[J.Vizuete]

I identify with this, too, but it presupposes that the other party knows something about what it is that they are drinking or has a particular interest in the bottle.

Case in point I had my best friend and his family over a couple weekends ago. They have been to Napa several times and enjoy richer pinots and cabs. The first night, we went to dinner and had a 1985 (his birth year) PLL that I had double decanted beforehand which was absolutely beautiful, showing better than I expected. It was enjoyed, worked with the food, and we had a lovely night.

The following night, we went to a different restaurant, where I ordered a 15 Bereche Rilly la Montagne and a 17 Dauvissat Forest. I thought the Dauvissat in particular was fabulous, but the group was more engaged and attention never really turned to the wine. Later, the somm who I know brought two blind glasses for me - a 17 Huet Haut Lieu demi sec and an 18 Château Lassègue (right bank bdx). The wine gods were in my favor and I called them both correctly, including the producer in the case of Huet.

The last night, we had steaks at home and I opened an 18 Maybach Materium that we just enjoyed from the bottle.

When I later asked what his favorite wines from the weekend were, the reply was, “the ones you guessed right at the restaurant. Just kidding, it was that great cab from Napa, 100% where can I get some of that? Oh, and what was the older one we had with dinner the first night?”

I don’t regret any of it, we had a blast, but I’ll probably save the handful of now rarities (Vatan, Juge, Raveneau, etc) in my cellar at least for interested parties. On that note, a person in one of my tasting groups mentioned never having had Raveneau before so we opened one last summer. That was the perfect setting for me - to satisfy someone.

[Jon_Lawrence]

I have brought a lot of nice wines to gatherings with non-winos and with the exception of Champagne, most people don’t appreciate the more expense stuff. Maybe they know something we don’t?

[Sarah_Kirschbaum]

@J.Vizuete

I identify with this, too, but it presupposes that the other party knows something about what it is that they are drinking or has a particular interest in the bottle.

I understand where you are coming from, and appreciate the stories, but I don’t agree they need to know anything about the bottle (the Keller example wasn’t intended to be definitive of the category). For instance, I have two friends, a childhood friend and her husband, who I know have good palates and love wine. They are singers and money is always very tight. They also know very little about wine beyond what a well read individual might. But the looks on their faces when they tasted special bottles I opened were a joy - not from the label, just what’s in the mouth. So I guess what I was saying is closer to it presupposes I know something about them, than that they know something about the wine.

[Rodrigo_B]

I think that’s the key—whether or not you think a friend will enjoy it or not. After all, there’s so much joy in sharing wine.

A few years ago I had some friends over. We started with cocktails and as the evening went a friend asked for a white wine, so I reached for a bottle of it. As I was grabbing a bottle, he remarked that I shouldn’t open any fancy wine as he didn’t know much about it and it’d be mostly lost on him. By then I had already grabbed something with some age to it. I took his comments to mean aged wine would be a significant departure from what he was used to, so I put the bottle back and opened something younger and more vibrant as I thought he’d enjoy that more.

He looked a bit awkward as he saw me do that and a few friends joked about it. I then explained that it wasn’t about any qualms I had on ‘wasting’ wine on him, but merely that his comments let me to believe he’d enjoy another wine more. Without hesitation I went back and opened the other wine so we could taste them both side by side. He did indeed prefer the younger option. We had a fun discussion around how older wine doesn’t always mean a better wine and that one shouldn’t be afraid voice their preferences and to drink what they like.

[Ben_M_a_n_d_l_e_r]

I may have missed it reading through the thread, but I think my attitude to this situation is a bit different. Looking at a lineup of wines that are functionally ungettable for most people, I would want to share it with budding winos or wine-curious people early in their journey (regardless of age) who probably haven’t had a chance to drink such wines.

When I was first getting seriously into wine in my late teens and early twenties, I met some really generous people further along in their wine journey (and with more means) who gave me the chance to try wines that I would never, and probably will never, have the chance to acquire myself. For someone getting into a world full of gatekeeping and elitism, this was huge for me, and I would love to be able to do the same for others.

[Mikael_OB]

@Steve_McL

Of note, among my favorite ways to explore a special bottle (or three) is with only one or two other winos. Quieter, and easier to pay attention somehow.

This is one of the ways I really love to explore good bottles, really gives the due respect to special wines.

[Mikael_OB]

This is probably the best/most fun type of people to open special bottles with. They have little preconceptions, and the pure honest reactions and joy in discovering a great wine…

[M_Meer]

I did a Burgundy horizontal recently. Everyone who attended likes wine but have varying experience levels. I opened 4 bottles and everyone found something they enjoyed most.

If we spend time with someone enough, we are apt to know their tendencies and the degree of their openness can extend to wine as well. I know who to pour Juras for and who not to – and this might be at the same party. If someone doesn’t like a wine, I don’t feel hurt – I didn’t make it

[Mike_Grammer]

For me, the best versions of this have been my quadrennial cellar depressurization events, attended by geek and non-geek friends alike. I open a spectrum of stuff, some of it quite good, and the most fun for me is listening to and seeing the two ‘subsets’ of people interact. It’s fun and really wonderful.