Overheard at the bar

I’m sitting at a hotel bar this week. Guy walks up and says, “four glasses of Port, please.” Girl looks at him like he’s got three eyes. I lean over and ask the guy, “you’re a Port drinker?” He says, “of course, I’m from Portland.”
pileon

Give me a little more color here – was he just cracking a joke, or did he actually think Port came from Portland (despite being himself from Portand)?

Sounds like he was just being funny

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Yeah, sounds like a solid joke.

Pretty sure he was joking but also pretty sure he wanted to drink Port. He settled on Macallan’s 18. We had a brief discussion about Portlandia before he went back to his table. The regular bar tender (who is a serious conspiracy theorist BTW) had stepped out for a smoke so I think someone from the back was covering for him. Nearby SFO…

It worked because he got a solid laugh out of me.

I’m not following…

I had some guy come into the bar last night where I was working and in front of an entire bar full of beer and spirits ask me “Give me a shot?”

I ask him… "Seriously, you want ME to give you a shot (as I glance over the entire shelf of spirits)

I said to him you should think a little and then I will take your order.

he then orders a Glenlivet neat…

Whew, I’m glad my name’s not Bud.

Did you put it that way? “You should think a little and then I will take your order?”

Yup I have been bartending off and on for 10 years, and when you come into a bar you should know how to order. End of story [cheers.gif]

I was going to offer him a shot of Chartreuse and Drambuie but I thought that would be patronizing.

And follks should know how to order wine at a wine bar as well.

Many moons ago in a Fort Worth wine bar with my wife and another couple…

Big cowboy walks in with the massive belt buckle and $500 Stetson on. He looks around, places hands on hips and proceeds to shout in a VERY loud voice to the person behind the bar “Y’all got any Silver Oak in here?”

I will never forget the cringe I felt, the look on my wife’s face or the dead silence that fell upon the room.

So when he went back to his table, please tell me there were 3 other people there and that the 4 glasses of port weren’t all for him…

Well, he WAS a patron!

or

Then you should have offered him a shot of Patron!

This brings back memories. How about when they ask “what’s good?” [head-bang.gif]

??? Obviously he wanted Jager. How could you not know? You just shamed him into the scotch…

Back quite some years ago, I was sitting at a bar where my friend was a bartender. A nice looking blond walks in and the conversation pretty much went as follows:

My friend asks her if he could get her something.
Her response, " what do you have?"
My friend, “Pretty much everything - we’re a bar”
Her, “Do you have beer?”
Me (drinking my beer and hiding my head so as not to laugh out loud)
My Friend: Yes we have several
Her: Thanks, nevermind I’ll just have a white wine spritzer

And you were paying attention to the conversation? [wow.gif]

Didn’t say I wasn’t looking at the people having the conversation [cheers.gif]

Was it the Woodman? He’s the only one I know who drinks wine in that part of Seattle. [snort.gif]