Well, people don’t really change. Maybe that’s my issue with these threads in a nutshell. If you want my earnest feedback, my suggestion is to focus on maximizing your own enjoyment and minimizing your aggravation, but to stop trying to create/impose a universally shared concept of the “right” way to participate in this forum. Only for those with whom you’ve actually built a meaningful relationship does it make any sense to try to change their behavior directly. Just about anybody else will just tell you to f*%^ off. That’s how it works in real life too.
If you think of this as just a public space – like a public park – to which different people with different personalities show up to have conversations, some of whom know each other but most of whom do not, it makes sense that you can’t really control the way things play out. But you can still have a great time while letting other people interact the way they like to, even if it is offensive to you.
In other words, pick the threads (conversations) you want to be a part of, avoid the ones that you don’t like, and put the people who consistently taint (from your perspective) the threads that you like on ignore. If most people did that in accordance with their own preferences, you’d have to work even harder to find something to wring your hands about.
Are the troughs the weekends? Does this mean that WB is just a work diversion when you have nothing better to do, but on weekends you prefer to have higher quality fun (as he gets a "who me? look on his face)?
Jay. Makes sense. I must be a fool. Thanks for the enlightenment. I wondered how long before someone turned it onto on me. You sir are a oak. I knew I could count on one here to prove my point and add nothing but criticism. It’s not about me. It was never about me. You chose to make it so. f you think I am just seeking something to wring my hands about you have missed the message.
I think it’s you, as well as myself. I’ve been posting less (still reading a lot) because I’m just kinda bored of talking about wine.
Highly recommend you check out reddit.com/r/nba if you haven’t Alan. I spend a lot of time there now. The amount of NBA information will blow your mind on there. All the breaking news will pop on there first, a lot of the stats you see on TNT/ESPN/pod casts/simmons/lowe etc are all culled from this subreddit. There’s a lot of immature posting but once you eliminate that trash your NBA knowledge will skyrocket.
If you are lucky to get some wine in the first wave of a highly sought after offering, I won’t name names but there was one of these last week, I find it in bad taste when those who get something start complaining about wish list grants not being filled while many other members are just hoping that some wine might trickle down to them in the second wave. Appreciate and enjoy what you got but please don’t rub it in.
Well, if my NBA knowledge increases any more, my head might explode from the immense number of bytes already in there
Thanks for the tip, I’ll take a look every now and then. Actually, I’m trying to tamp down the energy I expend following sports, it can be a big psychic drain. 9ers are making that easy for me this year, Giants cooperated, and Warriors will have their hands full in the West. I’m OK with that.
I expect many feel scared/intimidated to post Tasting Notes. There is no right answer for tasting notes - write for yourself and they’ll be fine - and we will appreciate it for an honest opinion with the words that work for you.
Disagreement, indeed passionate disagreement, is perfectly fine. Listen to the other views and you may still disagree. You’ll be better for considering different positions, even if you feel unchanged by them. Don’t be afraid to occasionally stand up against the angry villagers carrying torches and pitchforks. Try to argue clearly and without personal abuse. Sometimes we get carried away, but the best way to get us to reconsider is to talk to us, rather than shouting abuse.
Start abusing others and you’ll get a lot more abuse back here. That’s a shame, as there are a few trolls who seem to take pleasure in this, and it does nothing for the forum. Don’t be the person that starts it.
Don’t ask about good value Burgundy. It doesn’t exist, and if it did, then anyone calling it out would be ‘dealt with’. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS GOOD VALUE BURGUNDY. Well I suppose some aren’t too bad, such as Domaine J-aaaarrgh!!!
[Ian Sutton is currently undergoing the WB rehabilitation course and may be offline for some time until he learns to keep his mouth shut]
Jay
I don’t buy the idea that Mike is trying to impose or control - indeed he’s asking the forum what they think, not in any way dictating a set of his rules. I appreciate him voicing it.
I left an Aussie wine forum many years ago when a high profile forumite became abusive towards me, and the forum owner didn’t want to step in. I no longer felt welcome, so I minimised my aggravation and moved on. That will have happened here and that saddens me having experienced it myself. I’m sure it infuriates Todd because it results in him losing traffic / subscribers.
Do you fear this as being the thin end of the wedge, that the forum will ultimately become censored a la Squires, or become so politically correct that we can’t even argue? Personally I can’t see that happening. This board has a reputation for being feisty, independent and irreverent and I can’t see that changing. You may see it differently, so I’d be interested in your concerns about what might happen to the forum.
Rule #1 is good advice for sure, and while I have often given Rule #2 as advice in the past, I have kind of reconsidered lately - I’ve worked in some rough situations where people who were genuinely drunk and angry in real life said abusive things (Club doorman, years ago), so I have a pretty thick skin, but I’ve considered that I am actually probably a bit of an outlier in that respect, and that there’s no reason for people to be subjected to pointless bad behavior from other posters.
I have also found not assuming the worst about the motives behind posts is a good idea.
I’m not a good Wineberserker as life getting busier allows me less time here & more on stuff like IG & Delectable which don’t require me to think as much. Tried getting more into the Vinous board, but the message board style seems to be getting away from me. I have learned more from this board than I can state, so I will try to add more TN’s & be a better berserker.
In my estimation, we don’t need a Handbook. As I have said here on a # of occasions, just treat each other with respect and kindness. For sure, disagreements are good, because they open up new thought but it’s when someone calls another a foul name that I get turned off.
If kindness and respect are optional, and instead we ought to let people gather here and treat each other like crap, then I will do as I have and avoid those threads and people. Those people do not define the broader culture and community here.
I have a lot of goodwill, just not much to say on a handbook.
And I apologize about my paucity of tasting notes. I’ve found that as I get older (i) my sensory faculties have deteriorated and (ii) I don’t tear apart wines anymore - I just drink them (probably because I drink almost all of my wines in social settings without wine nerds these days - I’d rather focus on the conversations)
p.s. Frank - Well done for making your own statement with your current Avatar. Such an issue may have similarities with this discussion, but the repercussions of tolerating domestic violence are far more significant than our own hurt pride on a message board / wine forum.
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