It’s funny that you say this…my office had a no jeans policy for years. The reason was that someone would interpret the previous jeans allowed policy and wear their $150-200 stylish jeans and look great and then someone else would wear a pair of worn out wranglers and look like shit. We’ve gone to casual dress with the hopes of enticing people to come back to the office.
Early on during the pandemic, I cleaned out my closet and donated a dozen suits. They were expensive suits, but were older and they were styles from long ago. Baggy pants, three button jackets, etc. But I guarantee you that there is some dude who’s planning to go to The French Laundry and he’s going to wear that zoot suit from 1994.
Oh how interesting this thread is. Maybe the epitome of “to each their own?”
In the spirit of hospitality, I think TFL has gone the direction of most fine dining establishments in nixing the dress code. It’s honestly the right thing to do…why turn anyone away when your number one goal should be taking care of them??
Most dress codes are so outdated – I think “business casual” should be perfectly sufficient for fine dining experiences but fashion is totally subjective.
That is one thought. But what about taking care of the rest of the diners? If you dress in a jacket and tie and being surrounded by others doing the same makes you more comfortable shelling out big money for a high end dinner and they let people in with polo shirts, have you been taken care of?
No one lives in a vacuum. Everything we do affects someone else. That’s kind of being lost in today’s hyper-individualist society.
I’m not saying one policy is right or wrong, just that losing the dress code doesn’t take care of everyone any more than turning away someone for the wrong dress takes care of everyone.
I hate places with strict dress codes, but that is not to say I’m against dressing up. To me the best places are the ones that effectively make you want to dress up without actually having a dress code.
I think EMP during the Will Guidara days exemplified that really well. They didn’t, and still don’t, have a dress code, but the entirety of the occasion, the meal, atmosphere, etc. just made you want to dress up for it. It wasn’t a chore, but rather something one was eager to do to add to the evening.
We just got back from France and we’re pretty surprised that a Michelin 3* and 2* both sent us an email prior to dining stating that gentlemen were required to wear pants. At both restaurants, we were very surprised to see the very very casual attire of some of the diners - most notably sneakers and t shirts. From our perspective, it did diminish the atmosphere. I don’t think hubby will be packing a jacket next year.
I quit packing a jacket a long time ago. The go-ahead for me was at Steirereck maybe 10 years ago, before the remodel. I wore a suit and a rather corpulent gent diner wore a graphics tee shirt that didn’t cover his belly. And dad jeans. With his very young children in tow.
When Ms Reitbauer stopped by to chat, she said she didn’t like it, and shrugged. She also dismissed the children; not because they were children (she seated them), but because they caused a ruckus.
Similarly, I’ve transitioned in Paris from suit and tie to suit no tie to sports jacket and slacks to sports jacket and chinos to no jacket and chinos/denim. Except for the *** hotel restaurants that I tend not to like anyway, I’m comfortable and welcome in black jeans/chinos and a black sweater. There isn’t a restaurant in London that requires anything more, either.
During October Fashion Week, the costumery in Paris restaurants can be and often is weird or extreme, and weird and extreme. Gives me cover.
I’m much less bothered by what people wear than I am about cleanliness and grooming. And, depending on the restaurant, unnecessary screaming.
Yes, hubby has also moved to black jeans and a collared shirt or sweater for many settings. The unruly children aren’t acceptable to me if I’m paying that much to dine.
People seem to be more rude and lacking manners post-Covid. It’s almost like they forget what it’s like to be around others.
Ate at Dirty French in NYC last week. Got a text through Resy 30 minutes before my reservation that said…
“You’re due at Dirty French in 30 minutes. As a reminder, we do encourage our guests to dress for the occasion. We kindly request that baseball caps and athletic wear not be worn while at the restaurant. Tailored shorts are permitted.”
this is the exact argument I make. Most of the time I’m looking at older dudes in tweed jackets with elbow pads and ill fitting pants. Or horribly mismatched sports coat/slacks/shoes.
Just cause you put on a jacket with a collar and slacks, doesn’t mean a thing about actually looking proper
Outside of giving lectures and weddings I tend to rarely wear suits at this point; the most dressed up I tend to get would be polos or t-shirts with a jacket, usually something fashion forward.
I am much happier with places not having a code and people dressing as they enjoy. If I feel like dressing “up” other people’s attire has no impact on my enjoyment of a little bling.
I admit that I do find my enjoyment impacted by how other diners comport themselves, including dress. If people come to a beautiful, elegant restaurant looking like slobs, the vibe is changed for me. I don’t think suits and ties are reasonable requirements anymore, but some effort to look put together strikes me as appropriate. When I traveled in Spain with my in-laws, we made it clear to my FIL that he wasn’t allowed to wear open toed sandals, shorts, a t-shirt and suspenders to the nicer restaurants we chose. It was an uphill battle, but in the end he admitted he was glad we’d pushed the issue.
Of course, my position is perhaps effected by the fact that I personally love dressing up, and will take any excuse to wear a smashing outfit.
I have a line here, but not sure how to define it. I expect a quality of polished service from the restaurant and part of the implied contract for the diners as well. As lori (and others) said, the atmosphere needs to match for the experience to be complete.
If people dress for applebees, their behavior also tends to degrade to the level of applebees. Noise levels rise, etc.
Nice dark jeans and a button up shirt are minimum, but a “white linen” (for overly simplistic definition) calls for more.
Some of this may come from my upbringing, we could never afford to eat out, so it was a super special occasion. Wearing “sunday best” was absolutely befitting, even if my hand me down best wasn’t as nice or well fitting as others
As a kid, my parents went out to dinner once a year (train to NYC, cheapest tickets to the Met and dinner at Minetta’s Tavern) and as a family twice a year we went to Three Corners or Jerry’s Apizza for pizza. It was a time when dressing up was carefully codified. I can enjoy dressing up but these days dressing up can be defined in so many different ways and relying on the standards from back then just really does not - for me - connect with the more inclusive culture we live in. Now standards of grooming and basic cleanliness - sure - but I find it hard to define the ground rules when fashion has moved so far beyond suit and tie or cocktail dress.
