For several years I’ve been receiving the email newsletter of a great little wine shop in Eagle Rock, CA., called Colorado Wine Company. The couple that owns it were featured on a TV documentary that actually partially inspired me to open my shop back in 2006 (I wound up selling it 3 years later, but I don’t blame them ;o]). These guys are extremely creative and their newsletter is always fun. They’re a good hour drive from me, so I’m not customer, but I do really appreciate what they’ve done with their business.
Anyway… with respect to this topic… here’s their sense of humor at work in a scam situation:
The Fuzz Don’t Get Fuzzy
If you’ve been reading this newsletter for awhile you’ve heard reference to email scams we get on a weekly basis. It’s usually someone urgently trying to get really expensive bubbly via a courier service and Western Union and they’re going to shit themselves if it doesn’t happen in the next 10 minutes. You may even recall a twist on that scam involving cheese puffs that we received last year.
Anyway, we got another one. And this guy was just dumb enough to respond.
**On Feb 3, 2012, at 9:09 AM, Hettinger Andre wrote:
Hello,
I will like to know if you carry this champagne in stock or if you can special order them for me we need them for an event. Louis roederer cristal champagne 2004 vintage In gift boxes … 30 Bottles I will arrange for the pick up of the order from your location.And also let me know which credit card type you accept between Visa/MC…Will be expecting the quotation,so i can proceed with the payment details.
Regards.
Hettinger
**Our response on On Feb 3, 2012:
Hi Andre,
We prefer taking the Diner’s Club card if possible and our gift boxes are made of lamb’s wool and paraffin. If this is acceptable I would be glad to get together a quote for you. Visa/MasterCard will work as a very last resort.
Best,
John
Colorado Wine Company
2114 Colorado Blvd
La,Ca 90041
**On Feb 3, 2012, at 9:52 AM, Hettinger Andre wrote:
I’m glad to hear from you, go ahead and let me have the Quote…
Thanks
Hettinger…
**Our response on On Feb 3, 2012:
Great, Andre.
At $189.99/ btl, 30 btls comes to $5,699.70 + tax. Now keep in mind, with these limited edition lamb’s wool gift boxes, you have a strong fluffy factor. When I say “fluffy factor” I mean there’s a lot of volume so make sure your driver understands that his/ her car/truck will be filled to the absolute edges with lamb’s wool. Most importantly if he/she doesn’t like that itchy feeling on their neck and wrists from wool sweaters, boy they sure aren’t going to want to get in a car accident with this cargo!
That’s about it. I look forward to receiving your payment information and we’ll get this order fulfilled right quick. It’s a great bubbly and an even greater package.
Best,
John
**Two days later he sends a credit card number with no other information in the body of the email
**Our response on Feb 5, 2012:
Andre,
I finally have your product here. Thanks for sending payment information. Our credit card processing system is quite old so we often borrow our neighbor’s credit card terminal (or CC-TERM as we say in the biz). Our neighbors are the Los Angeles Police Department Northeast Division so the charge will show up as LAPDNE on your credit card bill. And just to avoid any confusion (and in case we’re closed, have run out for a latte, or just forget to open the store the day you come in) we will leave the bubbly at the police station and the nice men and women in blue will help you load up your car. They also like to be tipped for their work so please set aside 4 bottles of Cristal… BUT! And this is very important…Please oh God PLEASE take the lamb’s wool gift boxes off them first. The LAPD hates and I mean HATES the feeling of wool against their skin. I’m serious, they’d probably shoot you dead. So heed my words. And enjoy the bubbly!!!
Best,
John
Colorado Wine Company
** Nothing back from Andre yet, but we’ll keep you posted