Orin Swift 8 Years Release

WINE TALK
1
  • 2017 Orin Swift Mannequin - USA, California, Napa Valley
    The party line is that this is called Mannequin because you can dress chardonnay however you like. Well, why you gotta dress it up like [redacted]? There is no acidity – all lipids here. Extremely bitter oak and a goopy texture. (:poop: pts.)
  • 2017 Orin Swift Pinot Noir Slander - USA, California, Napa Valley
    There is a modicum of pinot noir character on the nose here, to the point you just might be able to call the grape if this were unfortunately served to you blind. It’s enough so you know what grape this “wine” is insulting. Simultaneously underripe and alcoholic. The palate is hollow, with not much to go on, and you get a nice whack of astringent tannin on the back end. The saving grace here is the lack of flavour; it means you’re not bombarded with overripe fruit. (:poop: pts.)
  • 2016 Orin Swift Abstract - USA, California
    Surprisingly, there’s a slight bit of pyrazine here, but if you told me this was some sort of alcoholic solution dosed with some pyrazine you bought off the Sigma-Aldrich catalogue I would believe you too. The weirder thing is that this doesn’t even have cabernet in it (or maybe it does. Could you tell? Could anyone?). Where did it come from? Maybe you just see what you want to see. Oh yeah, you have to try to dissolve some oak chips into that concoction as well. How can such high alcohol wine be so lacking in flavour? Such mysteries. (:poop: pts.)
  • 2017 Orin Swift Cabernet Sauvignon Palermo - USA, California, Napa Valley
    I’ll be pretty honest, I came into this tasting expecting high-octane wines with tons of overripe fruit, but nothing prepared me for the sheer lack of fruit in the lineup. It’s like it all got Raptured away or something (see, I made a religious joke because of the mummified priest on the label). Another empty and vapid wine in a long line of them, and then you get this massive whack (see, I made a mafia joke because the name of this wine is Palermo) of bitter oak tannin on the finish. (:poop: pts.)
  • 2018 Orin Swift 8 Years in the Desert - USA, California
    In the lineup, probably one of the “better” ones. The nose has a bit of orange peel, some dust, and a surprisingly correct hint of black pepper. For a zinfandel (at least, it says it’s supposed to be primarily zinfandel), there’s a serious lack of structure, and again this is a “wine” that is obliterated with heaps of bitter oak and alcohol. A smidgen of acidity. If it took me that long to get out of the desert just to run into this, I’d turn right back. (:poop: pts.)
  • 2016 Orin Swift Machete - USA, California
    In all fairness, this does have a bit of a nose like one of those modernist garbage Châteauneuf-du-Papes. The palate is a brutal assault on the senses, just an overdone heap of alcohol and bitter oak. There’s a little bit of powdery tannin here, but this is a “wine” that is about as subtle as its namesake. (:poop: pts.)
  • 2016 Orin Swift Cabernet Sauvignon Mercury Head - USA, California, Napa Valley
    This is the premium “wine” in the Orin Swift lineup. I suppose that means that this gets the most “fancy” oak. Nothing but the best here! Some varietally correct pyrazines, but unlike the name, this is as empty-headed as it comes. Framed by insane alcohol and noxious oak, there’s just nothing else. A bit of vanilla and no discernible flavour whatsoever. (:poop: pts.)
1 Like
2

Dude, you love pain… glad to see something other than 93’s…

3

Thanks for taking one for the team.

How did you run into THAT tasting obligation?

4

Phenomal read. Sorry you had to taste all those “wines”…

5

Please tell me this was a free tasting. You have summed up the wines well. I will be trying these wines in a week at a tasting but the good news is there are a lot of good wines at other tables.

6

Sounds like you don’t understand these wines.

7

The average wine drinker adores these wines. They didn’t pour the “Blank Stare” ?

8

The average wine drinker adores these wines. They didn’t pour the “Blank Stare” ?

They do until you have them taste them with proper stemware and applying the correct tasting process. It is amazing how expensive these wines are.

A better question might be: Why do critics give these wines high marks?

9

It’s an entire world of wine I know nothing about, so it was very enlightening.

10

Hardly an obligation, but definitely something of academic interest.

11

Nor the Papillon. I somehow get the feeling I didn’t miss much either way.

12

Sounds right.

13

Large wine publications have an obligation to not call out bad wine, as it hurts the feelings of their readership and you gotta sell/keep those subscriptions. Not to mention the massive conflicts of interest they have in not upsetting producers/importers/distributors/etc.

14

Oh wow… what a special tasting experience… :smiley:

15

“special”

16

John Glas wrote: ↑
Wed Oct 02, 2019 6:09 pm
A better question might be: Why do critics give these wines high marks?
Large wine publications have an obligation to not call out bad wine, as it hurts the feelings of their readership and you gotta sell/keep those subscriptions. Not to mention the massive conflicts of interest they have in not upsetting producers/importers/distributors/etc.

You win! champagne.gif

17

I’m so sorry.

18

I just opened a 2016 abstract and it’s terrible. Over oaked, over extracted grape juice…yuck!

19

8 Years in the Desert Cellar Tracker Average:
2016 92.6
2017 90.5
2018 92

20

I have to admit that I would have thought you were just trying to be a bit snobby, but after somewhat recently trying 8 Years in the Desert after hearing good things about it, I can certainly see all of your above notes being accurate.