Howdy, All. This is a repost of piece from my newsletter. Caveats: This is my third post, and I’m in the trade.
WHAT I HATE ABOUT OREGON WINE
A Few Gripes From a Sincere Fan
The other day, a client emailed me with a curious declaration. “You only write good things about Oregon wine,” he accused. “You never say anything bad about anyone, so I cannot trust you to give me unbiased information.”
Needless to say, I was deeply hurt. Well, perhaps mildly annoyed is more accurate. The fact is, I complain about various things regarding Oregon wine quite often.
It’s true that my notes are always quite positive. After all, I am picking those wines for special attention. Why would I choose to sell a crummy wine, mail it to you, and then pan the wine in my notes? Makes no sense at all.
I also avoid writing bad reviews just to prove that I can be critical. Rather than scaring folks away from bad wine, I prefer to send them towards the good stuff. Easier work, makes more friends.
That said, there are things about our industry I’m not fond of. And here they are:
BAD WINE - Everyone knows that we have somewhere around 686 wineries here, now. But are you aware of how many of them make bad wine? Of all the wineries that have started up in the past five years, many of them are mediocre at best.
This is bad news, because people buy that stuff! Folks who hear great things about Oregon wine are being lured into buying poor quality stuff. If the wine is then terrible, it does a disservice to the entire industry. Who wants the good name of Oregon pinot noir associated with miserable plonk?
HIGH PRICES - I talked to a young fellow the other day with a new pinot noir. He was only 30 years old, perhaps, and wants $75 retail for his new pinot noir. It was decent, but not seventy five bucks decent. I told him so. He looked smug. “We have great confidence in our product and our marketing plan,” he told me. I’m not going to buy the wine, though - it’s a complete rip off.
Now, Oregon producers will respond with “but we are still cheaper than California pinot noir.” Guess what? That horrible, gooey stuff is also overpriced - it is just more dramatically overpriced than our stuff. It’s actually at the point where Oregonians who are interested in wine cannot afford the domestic product! Take pride in offering good juice for less money, folks. Not every pinot is worth $50 or more. Check your ego at the door, or the market will do it for you. How many unsold 2011 pinots do YOU have left in inventory?
EGO DRIVEN WINERIES - You know the kind. Some folks make a bunch of money selling computer chips or drugs or weapons of mass destruction. They come to Oregon and hire a team: Vineyard guy, consulting winemaker, graphic designer, marketing wiz, PR firm. Next thing you know, a winery is born. There’s no need to own a vineyard, or a grape press, or even to get your hands dirty. Just throw some money at it, and you’re living la vida vino.
Sorry, that’s NOT being part of the wine industry. This type of “winery” is just a soulless management project. New Rule: You have to work harvest in a foreign wine region as a low-level cellar rat before you are issued a producer’s license. Might work.
WINERY LITERATURE - Every winery in Oregon is, essentially, the same winery! Read their literature - it was all written by one person, I’m convinced. They all grow grapes with the greatest care possible, sensitive of their connection to the land, honoring the sense of place, and strive for minimal intervene as the noble vine produces great winegrapes, and exercise stewardship, gently, harmony, balance, family, friends and wine, blah, blah, blah.
Is it possible to come up with a new way to tell the story? “We were sitting around getting drunk with our pals, like always, and figured that making wine would be more interesting then our current, boring job.” Really, just anything at all. New is good! Figure out a new way to pitch the product.
Let’s finish this up with one more pet peeve:
TOO MUCH OAK - Okay, Mr. and Ms. New Winemaker, listen up. Putting your juice into 100% new, heavily toasted oak barrels is NOT a good idea. Nor does is qualify as a “Reserve” bottling. Nor is it justification for charging too much. Nor does it taste any good at all.
This happens all the time. I call it “new winemakeritis,” or maybe “new winery-itis.” Their inexpensive pinot sells for a lot less and tastes a whole lot better, because it has been treated with less new oak. The most extracted, oaky, overdone and gawdawful juice becomes the “Reserve.”
Oregon pinot loves 15-20% new, medium-toasted oak. A little less is okay, too. If your wine is good, your barrels are perfectly matched to the wine, and you know what you’re doing, even 1/3 or (rarely) ½ new oak can work. But until your name rhymes with “Mike Etzel” don’t even try it. Give our collective palates a break, man.
There! I hope this proves that I can be as cantankerous and irascible at the next curmudgeon.